Short video content

Time is short when you’re a parent, so this content is designed to be easy digest and available to listen to on your timetable, for long enough even if life gets in the way.

Social & nervous systems

A unique approach blending sociological concepts and the human nervous system to help us comprehend with your brain and feel in your body.

Resources to support you

Short notes for every video, journalling questions and other helpful resources to build your understanding and make the content go further.

“I, myself, have always found that if I examine something, it's less scary.” 

- Joan Didion

When we have children, it quickly becomes clear that everyone has an opinion on our parenting. 

Judgements can made in person or online, they can subtle or explicit, well-meaning or not so well intended; they might occur in a baby class or at the swings or the school gates or on social media. They can come from health professionals, family members, other parents as well as total strangers, and the experience can feel shaming, crushing, dispiriting.

It can cause us to second guess something we’re doing or become stuck in a cycle of comparison with others, concerned they’re doing it “right” or better. Or we can find ourselves judging others and their choices.

Beyond Judgement is a short course that explores the roots and the role of judgement, competition and comparison in motherhood in order to challenge and disrupt negative patterns. Once we understand more about why judgement and comparison happens, we can go some way to removing the negative charge of both others’ AND our own judgements of ourselves.

My aim is that this course helps transform the way you view others as well as yourself. After completing the course you’ll:

• have a new understanding of the role of judgement in motherhood

• spend less time comparing yourself unfavourably to others and/or critiquing others

• feel less affected any judgements made against you

• make much less harsh judgements about yourself

When I studied sociology at undergraduate level as a 19 year old, lots of things fell into place for me. The questions I’d had about people’s motivations and reasons for behaviour, beyond the individual psychology that influences us, suddenly had answers, or at least theories to explain them. I have always been naturally curious about why we feel how we feel and why we do what we do, and having a more concrete sense about human behaviour was like a lightbulb going on in my brain.

When I became a mother, I had the same natural urge to understand exactly what it was that was happening to me - about what happens to all of us when we give life to another. At the same time, I was struck by how much I felt like I was a young girl again. There was the sense of being a total beginner, of having no idea what I was doing, whilst feeling horribly responsible for a tiny, vulnerable life. But also, at times it felt a little like being back in the playground - with certain “types” of mothers, judgements thrown around and a competitive sense of doing the right or wrong thing. I couldn’t help but compare myself to other mothers, those who seemed to be loving it or doing brilliantly or just coping better. But in moments I also found myself slipping into martyrdom - putting myself on a pedestal for everything I was doing and sacrificing, and feeling resentful and angry about those who seemed to have it easier than I did.

With my second baby, I felt more comfortable about my choices, and less triggered by what others were doing - but still, I was frequently surprised by how rattled and defensive I could feel by a throwaway remark or question, by someone sharing their experience of a baby who slept well or a choice they’d made that was opposite to mine. I noticed how my own judgements came out of the woodwork when I felt vulnerable or exhausted. I wanted to move beyond this, to understand why I felt the way I did and to feel more generous to both myself and others - to stop the experiences of self-blame (where I was not as good compared to others) and judgement of others (where they were having it easier than me, or not doing the right thing).

I started a training with Dr Sophie Brock, a sociologist, called Motherhood Studies. It shed new light on our collective experiences as mothers, our expectations, our ideals and our judgements. As the social structures that help to create our individual experiences became clearer, I was able to show myself more compassion and from there, to realise how often I’d either put others on a pedestal or at times, criticised their choices in order to protect myself and my own sense of being a good mother.

Beyond Judgement draws on my personal experiences as a mother of two children and my professional experiences as a doula, teacher, group facilitator and previously as a content manager. It also brings in the trainings I’ve completed as a yoga and embodiment teacher and motherhood professional. As well as my studies with Dr Sophie Brock, this course draws upon training with Kimberley Johnson, a somatic experiencing practitioner and expert on the female nervous system. The understanding I’ve developed of the human nervous system has meant many more lightbulb moments for me. I always teach about emotions in the body and nervous system functioning with regards to our experiences as social animals: not only does it adds colour to  our understanding, but it provides some freedom as we understand why we do what we do and more space to break free from patterns of behaviour.

I am passionate about bringing mothers together, teaching on topics relating to motherhood and supporting mothers to realise their own power and potential.